I'm entering my fifth year of blogging. I don't talk about it, ever, but those five years = two serious boyfriends.
Blog Boyfriend #1 got married a few weekends ago. I didn't expect to feel any way about it. I knew it was happening, and I knew the date it was happening, but I kind of thought the page would just fall away from my mental calendar without a second glance. I mean, I live 2000 miles across the country, and I've only kept contact with one or two of our mutual friends in the three years since our break up. There was a very small chance I could stumble on a photo from the big day on social media -- but even then, I'd have to go searching for it.
I didn't think I would notice.
But guys, the day came, and it was WEIRD.
So, how should you feel on the day your Ex is getting married? Any way you damn please. It's strange to think about someone you once shared your life with, permanently pledging their life to someone else.
I am so, very happy in my current relationship. I am so, so thankful for my past relationships that brought me here. I feel good that my Ex found a fulfilling life partner. But it's still weird.
So, on the day your Ex gets married, here's what I suggest:
- Acknowledge it. It's happening. It's weird. You noticed it & that doesn't mean anything besides the fact that you're a human being.
- Be grateful. I believe in fate, which means your Ex is your ex for a reason. There's something else in store for you.
- It's okay to be a little nostalgic.
- But don't forget the reasons it didn't work.
- If you ARE dating someone, be honest with them! I told my current boyfriend what was going on. He nodded. He said, "Yea, I bet that IS weird." And then we had an amazing day. We ate donuts, hung out with friends, took blog photos, drank too much coffee, followed it up with a few dark and stormies, chatted, walked, explored the city. It wasn't until the end of the day, laying sunburnt in my bed, that my mind wandered back to the wedding, just for a fleeting second.
- If you're NOT dating someone: make plans! There are a lot of people in your life in the present. There's no reason to dwell in the past.
And know this: when your Ex pledges his life to another woman, well there's no more permanent kind of closure in the world! Ha!
Photo: Nikond3200 35mm / Edits: Adobe Lightroom and Photoshop